Comments on Phem: Web | Blog | Magazine: Bridezillamania! Oh my!

what a difference two years makes...now that i'...

2011-07-27T07:59:18.845-07:00

what a difference two years makes...now that i'm going through all of this it makes me realize how insane the 'wedding industrial complex' is and how easy it is to go 'bridezilla' on someone! ha :) the stress level is overwhelming!

Jenn- of course you can use it! Glammie- I don...

2009-11-11T09:22:55.079-08:00

Jenn- of course you can use it!
Glammie- I don't see how not excepting money from both sets of parents makes it feminist. it would be different if just the bride's parents paid but both of ours parents contributed equally for our small ceremony and reception.
I can understand how getting a prenup is important to you and i respect you for it, especially because you both have

Here are my suggestions for a feminist wedding: Ti...

2009-11-09T18:37:45.229-08:00

Here are my suggestions for a feminist wedding:
Tip #1: Do not accept financial help with the wedding... that way your wedding can't be dictated to you. I know that sounds like a huge burden, but my husband and I lived at poverty level when we got married and we had a lovely wedding on a shoestring.
Tip #2: Do not say the word "wedding" when buying anything! This

Amy--This is a beautiful reflection of the complex...

2009-11-07T06:01:52.276-08:00

Amy--This is a beautiful reflection of the complexities between self and society, feminism and heterosexism, love and industry! Thank you for sharing this with the wider community. I would love to use this in class. In the end, you found a beautiful balance. Perhaps Bridezillamania had to live within you for a few days to get to this place of awareness, and ability to share your authentic

We thought very carefully on how to phrase our cer...

2009-11-06T09:23:02.070-08:00

We thought very carefully on how to phrase our ceremony. Because gay marriage rights are close to our heart, we eliminated all phrases of 'man and wife' 'husband and wife' etc. At the conclusion, we were pronounced simply "married"! And we were introduced at the reception as Mr. and Mrs. Aaron and Amy Edler. Also, instead of 'who gives this bride away?" we asked

Gosh, I never really thought about my own wedding....

2009-11-04T17:53:42.649-08:00

Gosh, I never really thought about my own wedding...until recently--In thinking, I really don't know how I'd react either because I tend to be a perfectionist in just about every area in life, and I can't imagine that I'd be lenient in that area.
I'm sure there would be stress. No doubt.
As for the dress: I wont lie I want a beautiful dress, but I'm not sure how

So many girls are raised learning to judge others....

2009-11-04T17:39:46.501-08:00

So many girls are raised learning to judge others. We, as feminists, need to learn from each other and never judge each other... none of us have perfect feminist actions. What is important is all the small steps (and leaps and bounds) we as individuals and groups take. I still wear my diamond ring, which I feel is branding me, but I also value my husband's feelings and try to wear it with

Don't forget that weddings can be wife & w...

2009-11-04T17:37:22.252-08:00

Don't forget that weddings can be wife & wife or husband & husband!

I initially got caught up in what you went through also. Unfortunately, by the time my vision cleared I was already in possession of a white dress. I found a great book, "I Do but I Don’t: Walking Down the Aisle without Losing Your Mind" by Kamy Wicoff, and there are a lot of blogs out there